July 22, 2024


The Gods Made Home

Relationship Assurance: Was This All You Needed To Keep Your Ex?

Assurance breeds confidence, comfort, trust, and certainty, regardless of the category it relates to. So, how much foundation can be built through a relationship based on this concept? I would think endless. When you reflect on your current or past relationships, is relationship assurance something that is a prevalent factor in whether you left or stayed?

The Mechanics of a Relationship

Generally speaking, relationships are acquired and maintained based on the same set of mechanics. In the beginning there is an initial attraction, then an intrigue followed by some form of chemistry. The attraction could be material, physical, or cerebral. This incites your intrigue which later leads to communication. Communication then triggers the pheromones and creates that mutual interest and chemistry that takes us from acquaintances to partners. Then, of course, sex eventually follows! We all have inhibitors that tell us what we like and don’t like. These influence us to seek out people who can fit a criteria pre-set for our likes. Sometimes its superficial things like gifts and social perceptions that lure us. Other times it’s more responsible things like ambition, intellectual conversation, and reliability. Either way, we sign up to have these things that we like in our lives for an extended period of time. And let me not forget the need to reciprocate those likes in order to balance the relationship.

Where Feeling Secure Fits In

Aside from love, there is no more comforting feeling we can have than that of safety and security. Many of you won’t admit it, but a lot of your happiness begins once you are somewhere or with someone who makes you feel secure. For example, let’s say you went to a party over someone’s house that you didn’t know by yourself without a familiar face in sight. Would you feel safe and secure? Probably not(unless your Chuck Norris!). While you’re in that mindset that you are not safe or secure, are you happy? Probably not! Security doesn’t only come from fear of bodily harm. You can also not feel emotionally, financially, or intellectually secure. Lack of any of these feels like a huge compromise, especially in a relationship. So, needless to say, security or assurance is an indispensable element of any flourishing relationship. Relationship assurance can sometimes be the determining factor of you being involved or alone.

Factors of Relationship Assurance

There are several factors that contribute to an assured relationship. I will only touch on the most prominent which are physical safety, emotional safety, and financial security. Physical safety is one that is geared more towards females in a relationship. Every woman wants to feels as though any partner with her can protect her from harm. This factor alone instills an element of comfort when dealing with anyone in even the most basic of relationships. Next is emotional safety. We all have vulnerabilities that we are willing to share with someone we know will embrace them and make a consorted effort not to exploit them. This is futile a healthy relationship. Last is financial security. This is one that has ruined many relationships. Financial security solidifies the confidence in a partner that virtually anything that comes along in the future can be addressed and solved. What we sometimes forget about this factor is that both parties are equally responsible in cultivating this element of assurance. Most everyone can be taught some way to generate an income that will support multiple people. Sometimes we just have to develop our partner into a financially secure person.

With the collaboration of natural relationship mechanics and the most prominent factors of relationship assurance, most any relationship should be able to withstand the test of time. We too often fall to communicate to our mates that we feel as though these certain aspect of the relationship are missing. But, if you have past, present, or future dealings with someone who genuinely cares about you and wants the relationship to last, learning to implement these keys to a successful relationship won’t be a problem.